Failing is the way to succeed. There's no success without a willingness to try, and sometimes trying new things means... failing at them. At first, maybe many times. We usually only see other people's successes and triumphs. We tend to take our own fails personally, and we tend to feel like the whole world is watching. That combo can make it feel like you're the only person getting it wrong. You're not.
In fact, just trying, especially after the fail, is doing more than most people are willing to. You're going to make it. You're going to succeed (and bonus round, you get to define success)! Results matter, and setting achievable goals makes people much happier and healthier as they keep trying. And most importantly, you're going to live while you try, learn, grow, reach goals, and set new ones.
Why am I writing about failing? I've been trying to do some stuff for months and months now. I failed at it. A lot. Repeatedly. (No measurable results on a reasonable goal.) I've tried, and tried, and tried. My self-talk, the chatter in my head, was sometimes full of anger, doubt, and worry. But I've learned, and lived, and grown while facing exciting challenges with my best efforts. Along the way, I've studied productivity and effectiveness. It's been tough, too, so I studied motivation and spirituality. All of this learning has been at about 10 times the rate I was before trying new things. (The best way I can measure how much I've been studying is to count the books read, and it's about 10x for the same duration.)
If I failed a lot, why am I so confident you will succeed? Because I haven't quit. Oh, I'm changing my approach a lot to meet some of my goals. But I'm stubborn, and I'm a better person for all those things I learned. I've learned some more self-compassion too. An amazingly cool bonus is now I have more compassion for other people because of the kindness to myself.
Success, though, matters. Since I'm not giving up, and since I'm better equipped to face new challenges, I'm going to make it. Same for you. Keep learning and growing, and you will make it. You may occasionally change your mind about what you need to succeed at. That's OK. You may make a lot of attempts that do not work. That's OK. You may hear some negative self-talk. You can choose not to listen, but it can be...loud. That's OK. You may feel like the only person on the planet who isn't succeeding at his or her chosen goal at the moment. You're not, and it's OK.
Just keep growing.
Gregory Hanks has taught community college for upwards of 17 years. He's helped thousands of students achieve more of their potential, write better, and earn their degrees. In 2017, he left a traditional teaching role to help more people like you get better results, faster.
Copyright 2019 G. Hunter Hanks Media L.L.C.